Friday 16 January 2009

Ventriloquism for Dummies

In light of the recent UK driving rules, where almost anything you do when behind the wheel of a car could be interpreted as "not being in proper control of the vehicle", you are at risk of a £60 fine and 3 points on your license if you are not 100% concentrating on the road.

Singing in your Car could cost you 3 points on your license

The new book, "Ventriloquism for Dummies" from Crackpot Press, will teach you techniques to evade capture, enabling you to sing along to your favourite tunes without anyone seeing your lips move.

Ventriloquism is 100% legal, and could save you from unnecessary expense

Mr Jones from Derby said: "What a complete load of rubbish, I bought Ventriloquism for Dummies, and didn't learn a thing"

When you buy Ventriloquism for Dummies, for a limited time only, you will also receive a sing-along CD, normally retailing at £180, with all of your favourite tunes, such as:

  • Night Fever - The Gee Gees
  • Dancing Queen - AGGA
  • Garcelona - Nonserrat Cagalle and Feddy Nercury
  • You Nake Lugging Gun - Fleetwood Nack
Ventriloquism for Dummies is not available in the shops, and this special offer is only available for a limited time.

Not only do you get a free sing-along CD, but you will also receive a roll of masking tape to put over your mouth whilst you practice - absolutely free.

"I got arrested for reading Ventriloquism for Dummies whilst on my way to work, what a waste of money." - Mrs Abbot, Gwent.

With Ventriloquism for Dummies, the free CDROM and Masking Tape, you will also receive a wire coat hanger, retailing in the shops at £52, but for you, it is absolutely free. You can wear this in the back of your jacket to prevent you from bopping around to the music in your car, and attracting attention.

Ventriloquism for Dummies has been written by Brother Robert, a Trappist Monk, and an expert in not moving his lips. His experience will guarantee your success.

Remember that this is not available in the shops. This fabulous collection also comes with a de-muffler exhaust loudener, worth £1021, to prevent anyone hearing the loud music going on in your car.

This fabulous collection, includes:
  • Ventriloquism for Dummies
  • Sing along CDROM
  • Mouth Tape
  • Posture Adjuster
  • Exhaust Loudener
And can be yours for a fantastic £299.99

Order now, terms and conditions apply.

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